Thursday, October 23, 2008

As for me and my house...

So now that I have posted all of the pictures I have taken over the past two months, I'll catch you up on the personal stuff.
I am officially moved in, roommate and all. There are still several unpacked boxes in the garages, I keep wondering how I got all this stuff? My mom and I painted the living room yellow and it really feels like home. I feel like I have taken over the apartment though. All the furniture, pictures, dishes, everything is mine. I had to beg her to put up two pictures of her and her daughter on the piano so it didn't just look like a shrine to Shaun and I.
I am still getting used to having someone else here. I am so independent, I can't handle having someone to answer to-someone asking me where I'm going, or what I'm watching, reading, cooking, etc. I'm sure I'll get used to it but it has been a long time since I had to tell anyone anything or think of anyone else's feelings in "my" home. It would be different if it was a boy-I would like a boy and want to tell him what I was doing and want to know the same from him but she's independent as far as I am concerned and doesn't need to tell me what she's up to.

I am substituting more now and still working for Source in Anaheim on the days that I don't. I do love substituting more and more. It is just fun to hang out with the kids.
Cub scouts is exhausting! Coming up with a new activity or two or three every week takes a lot of creativity that I'm not sure I have.
I heard the talk from Elder Perry about simplifying our lives and I think there are some days it applies to me. Mon and Wed I tutor a high school special needs kid. Tues. is cubs. Thurs is Shaun's piano lesson over at the college. Tues and Thurs nights are Shaun's gymnastics. Fridays I am helping a woman write a book. She has a great idea but no concept of actually writing it or editing it. This leaves me rather busy. It could have been worse Shaun was supposed to have baseball clinic on Sat. but it was cancelled due to low enrollment.

Heavenly Father seems to answer my prayers in the absolute opposite way of what I am expecting. I went to the Temple today hoping for help in accepting a situation that has recently come up. I have decided to stop wallowing and murmuring about my challenges and just accept them and handle it with faith and trust and calm. I wanted to be charitable and happy in this situation, put the needs of someone else ahead of my own desires and truly be happy for them. So, off I went to the Temple looking for support in my efforts.
The sesson started and I was still praying for help. As it progressed the wierest thing happened. The answer I felt was not to accept what was happening but to have faith that it wouldn't or that in the end it wouldn't. After sitting in the Celestial room and wondering how my expectations could have changed so drastically in an hour and a half, I was ready to go, but felt like I needed to wait for something. Then a sister I know walked in, she was totally an answer to what I was thinking about. Funny, huh?

All in all life is good. I loved General Conference, I always do, and have been gaining peace and answers to prayer in so many ways lately that I usually don't get. I am trying to be better. I want to be able to follow the promptings of the Spirit regardless of what they are or when they come. I don't want to miss anything because I simply wasn't listening well enough or thought, no it's really not important I don't have to do that. I want to make sure that I am choosing the right and that I teach Shaun to do the same. We have been working for this whole prop 8 thing. Keeping up signs, passing along information. The recent email that had been forwarded on from someone in Houston about listening to the prophet and being prepared really struck me. Am I prepared physically for the disasters that might arise. More importantly am I prepared spiritually for the disasters or blessings that might be coming my way? Am I close enough to our Father to know that I can always depend on Him and do I truly "hear" when he calls or do I just let it pass in one ear and out the other?

Well, gotta head to bed, tomorrow is another day.
Love, Shauna

1 comment:

  1. A truly beautiful post. Love the experience in the temple. I hope you know you are loved.



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